Title: 21 Up Up And Way Off The Mark
Series: Tiny steps
Writer: P E Leody
SYNOPIS: JANDY VISITS HER SON TO DETERMINE IF HE REALLY HIS HERS
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Caption: THE GOTHIC FACADE OF THIS LISTED BUILDING HIDES ONE OF THE BEST PRIVATE SCHOOLS IN THE UK. OR PUBLIC IF YOU'RE US. STILL SINGLE SEX.
Caption: ITS THE LAST DAY OF TERM, IT'S SPORTS DAY, AND EVERY PARENT IS THEIR TO SEE THEIR PRECIOUS LIFT SPORTING OR SCHOLARLY GLORY
JANDY: COOK, IT JANDY HERE, GREAT TIMING IT'S SPORTS DAY, THE PLACE IS PACKED, I MAY BE SOME TIME
COOK: AREN'T YOU MEANT TO BE THERE
JANDY: WELL YES
COOK: GOOD COVER THEN
JANDY: I THREW AWAY THE DETAILS
JANDY: HE'S MY SON, WE HAVE THIS UNDERSTANDING I DON'T ASK WHAT HE GETS UP AND HE DOESN'T TELL ME HE COULD BE ANYWHERE
TANNOY: WINNER OF THE 200 HUNDREDS METERS IS PICTOR, FENNEL HOUSE
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JANDY: HI, IS THIS SEAT TAKEN, COULD I BORROW YOUR PROGRAMME?
TANNOY: NOW THE FINAL EVENT THE JAVELIN
JANDY: HE'S PROBABLY A NERD RATHER JOCK, PROBABLY OUT OF SIGHT TILL THE PRIZE GIVING
JANDY: WHAT A STUPID SPORT WHO'D EXCEL AT THAT
TANNOY: THAT'S A GOOD THROW, A NEW UNDER 21S RECORD
TANNOY: SO THE BEST ATHLETE OF THE YEAR, THE WINNER OF THE VICTOR DE LA DORUM, PICTOR
JANDY: PICTOR, SOME ONE ELSE CALLED THEIR SON THAT, I DON'T BELIVE IT
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HEAD: THIS SCHOOL HAS GONE FROM STRENGTH TO STRENGTH UNDER THE GUIDANCE OF OUR OUTSTANDING HEAD BOY, VICTOR DE LA DORUM WINNER
HEAD: AND TO ADD TO HIS GLORY, HE'S ALSO BEST STUDENT IN THE COUNTY, HE NEEDS NO INTRODUCTION
PICTOR: THANK YOU SIR, THIS SCHOOL HAS REALLY FOCUSED ME AND BROUGHT OUT MY BEST POTENTIAL, I'M AN JUST THE VESSEL, THIS COMMUNITY IS MY SOUL
PICTOR: MADAM WOULD YOU LIKE YOUR SON TO BE IN A PICTURE WITH ME, FOR A SMALL DONATION TO THE MILITARY WIDOWS AND ORPHANS FUNDS, I'M ONE MY SELF
JANDY: COINCIDENCE I'M ONE TO
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JANDY: SO HOW ARE YOU DOING
PICTOR: FINE MUM I JUST KEEP COLLECTING THIS BLING
JANDY: JUST LIKE YOUR GRANDAD
PICTOR: I HEAR HE'S QUITE ILL
JANDY: STILL IN A COMA
PICTOR: MUM YOU MAY THINK I'M STILL A BOY, BUT CREDIT ME WITH SOME INTELLIGENCE, THE SCHOOL DOES
JANDY: THE RUMOURS OF THE COMA MAY HAVE BEEN SLIGHTLY EXAGGERATED, AND YOU WERE RIGHT PERHAPS YOU OUGHT TO CALL ME JANDY NOW
PICTOR: HOW MODERN, THIS SCHOOL INSTILLS MODERN VALUES
JANDY: HERE'S A PRESENT FOR YOU, I PRESUME YOU'RE ALL BOOKED UP TO TRAVEL
PICTOR: THANKS, YEP I'VE RENOVATED THE CESSNA AND WE'LL GO WHEREVER THE FOLLOWING WINDS BLOW US
PICTOR: OH WOW A CD, HOW DID YOU KNOW I COLLECTED ANTIQUES
JANDY: LIKE YOUR GRANDMOTHER
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TANNOY: TRUNKS TO BE SENT BY RAIL SHOULD BE STACKED BY THE UPPER REFECTORY, OVERSEAS BORDERS REMEMBER TO CHECK THEIR VISAS
PICTOR: I'LL COME AND SEE YOU BEFORE I START COLLEGE
JANDY: I'M NOT AT HOME AT THE MOMENT
PICTOR: YEAH I KNOW I PICKED UP SIGHTINGS OF YOUR JOURNEYS ON THE INTERWEB, NOT 'FLASHING' MAKES YOU REALLY STAND OUT
JANDY: THERE'S JUST ONE MORE THING
PICTOR: NO TIME, JUST CHECK MY DNA ON THE PAPER AND YOU'LL SEE I'M COMPLETELY YOUR SON.
JANDY: BUT HOW
PICTOR: SOME HOLOGRAPH CHEAP COPY OF DAD TURNED UP TO TRY AND STRONG ARM ME
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