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| chronicle | Mighty Harm Done | 1/5 | on 60731 | at punding.com |

Title: Mighty Harm Done

Series: Chronicle

Writer: P E Leody

SYNOPIS: COMPUTER TECHNICIANS TRY TO REBUILD A BROKEN COMPUTER FIND THEY ARE MISSING A FEW KEY FACTS

PAGE 1


A bell is ringing

Caption: A SUDDEN NOISE ENTERS YOUR SUBCONSCIOUS

Sfx: KERRING

ROBIN BLAND: BELLS, THE BELLS WHY'S IT ALWAYS BELLS.


Robin sleeps with a cushion over his head, where he is, is not clear

Caption: IT SWAPS YOU TO THE CONSCIOUS

ROBIN BLAND: ITS, NEVER THE DAWN CHORUS OR THE HEATING COMING ON


Jane, Robin's sister, pulls the cushion off and holds it behind her head. The shot is of Jane only

JANE: THAT IS NOT THE ALARM CLOCK

ROBIN BLAND: WHO ARE YOU ARE YOU AN ANGEL?


Robin awakes, he is asleep on a sofa fully clothed

JANE: THEY WORK YOU TOO HARD

ROBIN BLAND: OH IT'S JUST YOU SIS


Jane is one of three girls playing poker around a smokey table

JANE: YOU CALLED ROUND AFTER WORK TO SEE IF WE WERE GOING OUT. WELL, WHILST YOU SLEPT WE WENT FOR A DRINK, ENDED UP IN A CLUB AND HAVE JUST GOT BACK. YOU JOINING IN?


Robin rises and leaves the rooms

ROBIN BLAND: POKER WITH YOU 3 WITCHES? NOT A CHANCE, MY MONEY STAYS IN THE MAXI ISA

PAGE 2


An outside shot of Jane (Robin's sister's) terrace house

Caption: PERHAPS THE BELL THAT WOKE YOU WAS JUST YOUR BODY CLOCK TELLING YOU THEY ARE ABOUT TO STOP SELLING FOOD. BESIDES THERE'S NO ONE AT THE DOOR NOW


Robin orders from a white van, he has a six pack of beer hanging from his belt and two spirit bottle in his pockets

ROBIN BLAND: LARGE DONER, CHILLIES, SALAD, BETTER MAKE IT A DOUBLE, AND IF YOU'VE NONE LEFT JUST ROAST THE SHEEP DOG THAT ROUNDED THEM UP


As Robin goes to eat the kebab Alan sneaks up and pats him on the back, Robin splutters

Caption: ITS ALL ABOUT THAT FIRST BITE, UNINTERRUPTED, A SOLE EXPERIENCE, THE HOT FLESH, THE FAT ROLLING OFF

ALAN SMITHEE: OH THERE YOU ARE, YOUR PHONE'S OFF, CHECKED YOUR GAFF BUT FOUND YOU AT YOUR SISTERS. THE OFFY'S CLOSED GOT ANY TAKEOUTS?

ROBIN BLAND: KERSPLUTTER


Alan opens and drinks a can all in one

ALAN SMITHEE: YOU BETTER DRINK ALL YOUR ALE IMMEDIATELY

ROBIN BLAND: I'VE GOT TO BE IN WORK IN 5 HOURS

ALAN SMITHEE: THAT NO LONGER MATTERS, DRINK YOUR BEER IT'LL CUSHION THE IMPACT


Alan and Robin run

ROBIN BLAND: WHY'S WHAT'S GOING ON

ALAN SMITHEE: WORK CALLED US BOTH IN, THE COMPUTER'S CRASHED WE'RE ON THE CLOCK TIL IT'S FIXED, THEY SENT TRANSPORT, LAST ONE THERE HAS TO ANALYSE THE CORE DUMP


A large alien spacecraft in a field, Alan and Robin run towards it

ROBIN BLAND: OH NO, THEY SENT THAT CHARABANG

ALAN SMITHEE: TOLD YOU TO DRINK UP

PAGE 3


Robin and Alan burst into the space craft, Robin knells and starts to throw up. A manager looks on

Caption: THESE OLD BONE SHAKERS CHURN THE CONTENTS OF YOUR STOMACH UPON TAKE OFF

ALAN SMITHEE: WE'RE BOTH HERE WE CAN LEAVE NOW


The space craft flies into outer space

Caption: WORSE THAN ALL THE BOOZE, WORSE THAN THE SIGHT OF KEBAB IN DAYLIGHT, IS WHEN THE NEXT MORNING YOU REALISE YOU'VE EATEN THE WHOLE KEBAB, YET WHEN THEY GAVE IT TO YOU IT WAS WRAPPED IN PAPER


Robin looks at data on a laptop

ROBIN BLAND: YEP IT'S A COMPLETE CRASH, WELL WHAT DO YOU EXPECT ON A COMPUTER DESIGNED BY A COMPUTER, IMPERFECTIONS MULTIPLY


An electronic receiver

ALAN SMITHEE: THE LAST KNOWN RECEPTION WAS 45

ROBIN BLAND: 45, DID IT RUN OUT OF MEMORY, GOT IN AN INFINITE LOOP, CORRUPTED IT'S OWN CODE? WHAT SORT OF ANSWER IS A NUMBER? IS THIS A QUESTION?


Alan and Robin look in bewilderment at something

ROBIN BLAND: PERHAPS IT KNEW THE FUTILITY OF IT'S PROGRAM AND JUST GAVE UP

ALAN SMITHEE: POWER SAVING, HIBERNATION, SHUTDOWN OR SWAP USER?


Caption: WHERE THE COMPUTER ONCE STOOD IS EMPTY SPACE, THERE'S NOTHING THERE

ROBIN BLAND: THERE'S NOTHING THERE

Caption: I ALREADY CAPTIONED THAT

ALAN SMITHEE: THERE'S NOTHING THERE

Caption: DON'T READERS READ CAPTIONS

ROBIN BLAND: NOT IF THE ART IS DESCRIPTIVE ENOUGH

PAGE 4


The space craft scans space

Caption: A SWEEP OF THE SPACE WHERE THE COMPUTER USED TO BE REVEALS

ROBIN BLAND: THERE'S NOTHING THERE

ALAN SMITHEE: THERE'S NOTHING THERE

Caption: SHE ABOVE


Robin and Alan talk

ROBIN BLAND: IS DESTRUCTION COVERED BY OUR SERVICE LEVEL AGREEMENT?

ALAN SMITHEE: DEPENDS WHAT CAUSED IT, WE MIGHT BE LIABLE FOR EVERYTHING OR WE COULD SUE THEM FOR BREACHING THE AGREEMENT


A large cruise ship like space craft travels through space

ROBIN BLAND: DIDN'T THE POLITICIANS SEE IT HAPPENING AND SAVE THEMSELVES IN ESCAPE PODS OR ARK LIKE THAT CONTAINING GENE POOLS


A signal detector flickers in Alan's hand

ALAN SMITHEE: DUNNO BUT THERE SEEMS TO BE SOME TRACE EVIDENCE IN THAT VESSEL OVER THERE


The space craft moves towards the ship

ROBIN BLAND: ACCORDING TO THE SERVICE LEVEL AGREEMENT THEY HAD NO OFF SITE BACKUPS, THEY'VE LOST EVERYTHING. THEY'LL HAVE TO BE A BESPOKE REBUILD

ALAN SMITHEE: I'VE IDENTIFIED THE SOURCE OF THE SIGNAL


A bald man in a forest wearing a dressing gown with a towel over his shoulder with two mice perched on it. He holds some gizmo in his right hand

ALAN SMITHEE: ITS THE BLACK BOX

PAGE 5


Robin enters a warehouse brandishing piece of paper

Caption: WEEKS LATER

ROBIN BLAND: HI I'M DARTH GENTLY, I WON YOUR AUCTION OF AN OBSOLETE COMPUTER ON ESHILLING ON THE INTERWEB. BUYER TO COLLECT


The space craft drags a planet with a huge net

ROBIN BLAND: ONCE WE GET IT INTO PLACE WE'LL JUST HAVE TO REPROGRAMMED IT

ALAN SMITHEE: WITH NO BACKUPS. I WASN'T AROUND WHEN THEY BUILT THE ORIGINAL


Robin and Alan stand in the space craft's viewing lounge talking to the back box of the previous computer, the old man

ROBIN BLAND: WE STILL HAVE THE BLACK BOX, AFTER WE CLEANED OFF THE VERMIN IT MIGHT STILL BE FUNCTIONING

ALAN SMITHEE: LOOKED LIKE IT WAS WELL SHOT TO PIECES, TO ME


The Old Man smoking and drinking in his dressing gown. His towel is laundered and hung up

OLD MAN: ITS SO GOOD TO GET A PROPER PAIR OF GLASSES MINE HAVE BEEN DETERIORATING FOR CENTURIES

ALAN SMITHEE: WE KNOW NOTHING OF THE COMPUTER YOU CALL EARTH WE NEED YOUR KNOWLEDGE TO RESTORE IT


A weird planet surfaced with dinosaurs intermingled with skyscrapers, modern jets and old weapons

OLD MAN: SORRY LOVELY, G AND TED OUT, HOWEVER I BROUGHT A BOX SET OF DVDS OF THE ASCENT OF MAN JUST IN CASE

ALAN SMITHEE: ITS SAYS GOJIRA ON HERE

OLD MAN: YEAH THAT'LL BE IT

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