Title: Better News
Series: Chronicle
Writer: P E Leody
SYNOPIS:
PAGE 1
RADIO: CARTER AND REGAN DRIVING A FORD CORTINA, REGAN AND CARTER DRIVING A FORD GRANADA
JAGUAR: NOW THAT’S WHAT I CALL MUSIC
CARTIER: BEST DRIVING SONG IN THE WORLD.. EVER
SERGEANT: YOU TWO LOUTS FINISHED BREAKFAST YET? SUIT UP THEN RETURN TO BASE
JAGUAR: THIS PAYOLA MAY PAY THE RENT BUT IT UPSETS ME, COLLECTING IT
PUBLICAN: ITS NOT ALL HERE IT'S BEEN A BAD WEEK
JAGUAR: LOOK AT THE DOOR, NEXT TIME WHO KNOWS WHAT I'LL REARRANGE?
JAGUAR: REALLY UPSETS ME
CARTIER: THAT'S YOUR DIGESTION BEING RUSHED, MILKY COFFEE'LL SETTLE THAT
SERGEANT: WELL YOU'VE DRAWN THE SHORT STRAW ON THIS ONE, YOU'LL BE PROTECTING A ROCK BAND
JAGUAR: DREAM COME TRUE, THINK ABOUT ALL THOSE RIDERS
CARTIER: EXCESS, DEGRADATION, LONG HAIR, ILLEGAL SUBSTANCES
JAGUAR: ALL IN A DAYS WORK
CARTIER: THEN, WE'LL BE ABLE TO BUST THE WHOLE GODDAMN CREW
PAGE 2
ANGUS: YOU REALISE YOU HAVE NO JURISDICTION, AND YOU'RE JUST A FIGUREHEADS
JAGUAR: SO THAT'LL BE NO WORK TO DO
ANGUS: YOU HAVE VIP STATUS SO THE TOUR CHEF WILL BE AT YOUR COMPETE DISPOSAL
CARTIER: SO JUST TO CLARIFY NO WORK TO DO
ANGUS: THAT’S THE HAIRDRESSER, MANICURIST, ACUPUNCTURIST, PEDICURISTS, JEWEL POLISHER, HER TWIN SISTER, ASSORTED COUSINS, CHIROPRACTOR, COBBLER, WELL YOU GET THE DRIFT AND NOT FORGETTING HORNY THE TOUR MASCOT AND EUNUCH
JAGUAR: EXCELLENT BETTER CHECK OUT THIS CHEF FIRST
JAGUAR: ALL ACCOUNTED FOR, THE CHEFS SITTING UP THE FRONT IN CASE WE NEED A PIT STOP
CARTIER: THAT’S IT THEN BETTER LEAVE THE COFFEES GETTING COLD
JAGUAR: SO HAVE YOU HEARD ANY OF THEIR MUSIC
CARTIER: I THINK ONE OF THEIR TUNES WAS USED FOR THAT APPLE SMELLING SOAP
JAGUAR: OH I LIKED THAT
CARTIER: SO DID THE BEES WENT STRAIGHT FOR ME
JAGUAR: CAN'T REMEMBER THE MUSIC THOUGH
PAGE 3
SINGER: GRAB THE BONE SAW, CUT ME DOWN TO SIZE, I'M IN LOVE YOU, SO I'M ALREADY ANAESTHETISED
SINGER: FURNITURE IT GLUES AND BONES THEY HEAL
SINGER: SCARS ARE INVISIBLE AS NEARLY ARE THE WHEALS
JAGUAR: WHAT A FIDDLING DIN
CARTIER: THIS IS SUCH EASY MONEY
JAGUAR: THE MUST BE SOMEONE WILLING TO TAKE POTSHOTS AT THIS LOT
CARTIER: WELL THE DRAGON AINT GOT THE BALLS TO DO IT, LITERALLY
SINGER: FUTURE FUNCTIONS ACHES AS DAYS DO WEAR
JAGUAR: NO ONE VAGUELY DESTRUCTIVE
CARTIER: ITS WORSE THAN THAT J
SINGER: I HURT EACH MINUTE SECONDS ARE ALL I CAN BARE
CARTIER: THERE ALL SO DUNG HAPPY
PAGE 4
NEWS READER: HISTORY WAS MADE TODAY AS HUNDREDS OF YEARS OF WAR WAS ENDED WHEN THE PLANETS SHOOK HANDS, TAKING INSPIRATION FROM A GIG HAPPENING NEARBY
JAGUAR: THAT’S IT THEY'RE NOT PULLING THE FLEECE OVER MY EYES ANYMORE, THERES SOMETHING GOING ON AND I'M GOING TO GET A CUT OF IT
CARTIER: AFTER THE NEXT ROUND HEY J
CARTIER: ALL EQUIPMENT MEETS THE GUIDELINES, ALL NOISE LIMITED, EARTH TESTED, PHASED UPGRADED, AURAL KIND, GREEN RUNNING..
JAGUAR: ITS EVEN STACKED CORRECTLY, DUST FREE, ODOURLESS DEGRADABLE PAINT
CARTIER: THE ONLY FOREIGN OBJECT ROUND HERE IS THAT SECOND TO LAST DONUT YOU HAD
JAGUAR: THIS PLACE IS CLEANER THAN THE EASTERN HEMISPHERE BLAST AFTER THAT LAST OIL FRACAS
CARTIER: ZILCH
JAGUAR: I'VE FOUND OUT WHO ATE ME PEANUTS THOUGH
PAGE 5
JAGUAR: LOOK WE'LL JUST BLUFF EM THERE NOT USED TO OUR HARD NEGOTIATION
JAGUAR: RIGHT YOU TARTS, WE KNOW WHAT YOUR UP TO AND WE DEMAND A CUT OF THE ACTION
SINGER: SO WE HAVE MADE FANS OF THE BOYS THE BLUE
CARTIER: YOU GOT IT WE WANT IN
SINGER: WHATEVER WE HAVE WE PLOUGH BACK FROM OUR HEARTS ON TO THESE FOR OUR FANS, LISTEN TO THEM
CARTIER: ITS WORSE TAN THAT GIG
JAGUAR: THERE OUGHT TO BE A LAW AGAINST THIS TRIPE
CARTIER: ANOTHER DAY ANOTHER DOLLAR
Sfx: KERBANG
NEWS READER: A TRAGIC ACCIDENT HAS JUST KILLED THE COSMOS' MOSTPOULAR AOR BAND
CARTIER: GOOD GRIEF TOTALLY DESTROYED WHO'D HAVE THOUGHT IT
JAGUAR: AND US WITH THE ONLY COPY OF THEIR LATEST ALBUM, COME ON I'M BUYNG
PunDing.com/skript/40105
