| ignore alien orders | Guns Dont Kill | 2/5 | on 30826 | at punding.com |
Title: Guns Dont Kill
Series: Ignore alien orders
Writer: P E Leody
SYNOPIS:
PAGE 1
1
Head shot of a leader (Lascoe) addressing his troops
LASCOE: THIS PLANET WAS FOUNDED BY INDIVIDUALS IN THE NAME OF FREEDOM
2
A full body shot of Lascoe addressing his troops
LASCOE: IT HAS SUFFERED AND BENT UNDER THE STRAINS OF MAINTAIN IT'S FOUNDERS' IDEALS
3
Lascoe's final rallying calls causes his troops to raise their rifles
LASCOE: TODAY WE HAVE ANOTHER CHANCE TO REEDUCATE THE ENEMY IN OUR BELIEFS
4
The troops emerge from a space shuttle door
LASCOE: SPREAD THE WORD!
5
Lascoe's head looks at the enemy
6
An alien looks at the advancing troops
7
The aliens flee dropping their weapons
ALIEN: MEEP MEEP
8
Aliens advance with a white flag
LASCOE: DON'T SHOOT
9
The troops fire and kill the approaching aliens, a big pile of bodies is forming
LASCOE: TILL YOU SEE THE WHITE OF THEIR FLAGS
PAGE 2
1
A member of the troop guarding the shuttle entrance
2
From behind a tree an alien looks on at the guard
3
The guard starts a patrol leaving the shuttle door unguarded
4
The alien approaches the shuttle door a voice can be heard
LASCOE: OPERATION COMPLETED
5
Having entered the shuttle the alien creeps up on Lascoe who is talking to a view screen
LASCOE: MY REPUTATION AS THE GENOCIDE GENERAL REMAINS UNCHALLENGED
6
A reverse shot shows a weapon being raised at the alien's back, the hunter becomes the hunted
TROOPER: SURPRISE
Sfx: KERCLICK
7
The frame is covered in a congealed mess deceiving the reader into thinks the alien's brain has been splattered
Sfx: KERSPLAT
PAGE 3
1
Outside a country pub an alien lurks in the shadows
2
Lascoe is at the bar, the alien approaches hands outstretched looking like it's about to attack him. Lascoe's hands are outstretched towards to unseen bar.
3
Two head shot of Lascoe having turned to face the alien in surprise
LASCOE: A LONE SURVIVOR, QUICK TROOPER ….
4
Lascoe hands the alien a drink, others look on laughing
LASCOE: .. GET THIS FREAK A DRINK
PAGE 4
1
Lascoe and the alien playing darts
LASCOE: YOU'VE HIT THE BOARD, THAT'S A 'DOWN IN ONE'
2
Lascoe pukes in a bowl whilst the alien drinks a yard of ale
LASCOE: THE UNIVERSE MAY HAVE GONE METRIC BUT WE'VE STILL OUR YARD OF ALE.
3
Lascoe and the alien are dancing with some cliched discos moves
LASCOE: BET YOU DON'T HAVE THIS WHERE YOU LIVE
4
Lascoe and the alien wander off into the moonset, along a desolate path between the hills, an alien spacecraft is close by about to land
LASCOE: YOU SEE MY FRIEND WE MAY LIVE MANY MILES APART BUT WE ARE UNITED BY MERE AQUA, HOPS BARLEY AND YEAST
5
The alien space craft has landed and two different types of alien have surrounded Lascoe and the alien
PAGE 5
1
Lascoe recovering from a hangover rubbing his eyes hears a voice
JUDGE: HATE CRIME COURT NOW IN SESSION
LASCOE: KEEP THE NOISE DOWN WILL YA
2
Lascoe and the alien are in the dock of a court being run by the aliens that landed and captured them on the previous page. The alien is currently obscured by Lascoe
JUDGE: SILENCE IN COURT, PLEASE READ THE CHARGES
BAILIFF: ONE COUNT MASS GENOCIDE BY THE EARTHLING LASCOE
3
A shocked Lascoe
LASCOE: GENOCIDE? THAT WAS JUST A PAINT BALL GRUDGE MATCH BETWEEN 2 RIVAL COMPANIES
4
The alien removes his mask to reveal a person, Hampton
HAMPTON: THE VISITING TEAM HAS TO DRESS UP AND KEEP IT ON IF THEY LOSE
5
The Judge addresses the bailiff
JUDGE: BAILIFF PLEASE SILENCE THE ALIEN SINNERS, AND READ THE CHARGES
6
The bailiff address Hampton and Lascoe now both visible in the dock
BAILIFF: ONE COUNT MASS GENOCIDE ON THE EARTHLING LASCOE AND HIS COMPATRIOT HAMPTON
LASCOE: DO YOU UNDERSTAND PAINT BALL, GAME, FUN, LET OFF STEAM, HARMLESS PAINT PELLETS
7
The bailiff shows his hand with a paint ball ammunition ball in it's hand
LASCOE: LET THE RECORD SHOW THE ACCUSED REFERS TO THEIR ACCUSERS AS INFERIOR OBJECTS OF FRIVOLITY
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